A note to the Sangha from Jikoji Guiding Teacher
Shoho Michael Newhall
This "Time of the Virus," a time when all are obliged to keep the distance, not be a vector, but nonetheless still be in touch - this has now become our special awareness practice. Additionally we may invite ourselves to look at this necessary spaciousness and carefulness as a teaching, a topic of research, investigate its emotional flavours, what extensions mean other than arms and legs, see if a mirror is out there with another mirror returning its gaze, see each tree and see the sky, see what the weather is like.
I am remembering the first study group of this winter's practice period, with Connie, the Shuso, introducing the Paramitas with a discussion on Dana - giving, generosity. One of our zen ancestors said neither touching nor turning away are correct, for it is like an intensive fire. There is burning if too close, and it is too cold going the other way. Yet there is still touching even when there is no touching. This is the temperature of our life. When it is most difficult to give, that may be the time to give. But what to give, when to give, where to give, and a small drop or a splash on the face? And hasn't it already all been given? Is there nothing to receive when no one is at home? Am I only at home when I have visitors? And do my visitors make me the home?
Everyone agreed we have to return off the boat with empty hands, we have to open the closed fist completely, we have to "forget the perfect offering," and dissolve completely any hooks to what was given. In remembering that meeting, I later encountered a poem by Jane Hirshfield. In this poem "eland" refers to an African kind of antelope.
The Weighing
The heart's reasons seen clearly
even the hardest will carry
its whip-marks and sadness
and must be forgiven.
As the drought-starved
eland forgives
the drought-starved lion
who finally takes her,
enters willingly then
the life she cannot refuse
and is the lion, is fed
and does not remember the other
So few grains of happiness
measured against all the dark
and still the scale's balance.
The world asks of us
only the strength we have and we give it
then it asks more, and we give it.