Jikoji Zen Center Community Agreements
Adopted by Jikoji Residents: December 15, 2023
Adopted by Jikoji Board of Directors July 6, 2024
Introduction: When we participate in Jikoji Zen Center (Jikoji) activities, we may find ourselves in communication with fellow Sangha members on personal topics that reveal elements of our inner lives. This can lead to a sense of heightened vulnerability. In an effort to make sure we sustain a practice environment that is caring, respectful, and that feels safe and supportive for all students and teachers, we offer these community agreements. They are meant to guide our communication and behavior when we participate in Jikoji gatherings, including services and zazen, work meetings, council gatherings, and personal conversations with fellow practitioners.
Thank you for reviewing and applying these guiding principles in your behavior at Jikoji. If you have questions about any of these agreements, please feel free to reach out to our Practice Mentor and/or Guiding Teachers. Those names are listed on our website.
Thank you for your practice.
1. Respect Each Other and Our Place of Practice.
We begin and end our meetings on time, but all are welcome to come and go as they might need. We make every effort to take care of our environment, keeping the space clean, uncluttered, and accessible. We ask before touching someone’s body and we are free to say no to touch.
2. All Are to Be Addressed as They Wish.
Address each other as they prefer to be addressed. We do not assume the race, class, gender, sexuality, or ability of anyone else. We have the individual option to share pronouns and we will collectively respect these pronouns.
3. Honor Intimacy, Privacy, Confidentiality.
We recognize that dokusan - practice interviews with a teacher, practice discussions, and many other discussions within dharma groups are venues for sharing highly sensitive information. Those engaged in such discussions and events are expected to respect confidentiality on the basis of mutual trust. All sangha members are expected to refrain from idle talk about such matters.
(The notable exception regarding confidentiality: If you are aware of or suspect any abuse, you are expected to report that immediately to the Practice Mentor, Guiding Teacher, and/or a member of the Board of Directors so that action can be taken.)
When conflict arises, please address the matter first directly with the other sangha member or members involved. If this approach does not help resolve the matter or is not feasible, we encourage sangha members to speak to the Practice Mentor, Guiding Teacher or one of the designated members of the Board of Directors whom they trust.
4. Deep Listening.
In our dialogues, we listen deeply with full attention making every effort to drop our own viewpoints and instead engage with what is being communicated without formulating a response. We are open to surprise, to learning something new, to being changed.
5. Practice Care in Speech.
In discussion, we speak as much or as little as feels appropriate, always with an awareness of the community, others’ need to be heard, and with a sensitivity to the amount of time available for all who wish to be heard. Full participation is encouraged, but the option to remain silent is always available and honored.
Our intention is to follow the precepts on Right Speech and consider whether our words are true, useful, kind, and timely. We share our experiences truthfully and as completely as we might want, whatever our views or life experiences. We endeavor to be open to surprise, learning something new, to being changed.
We ask permission before offering advice, unless directly asked.
6. Practice Self-Focus and Speak from One's Own Perspective. Recognizing that we cannot assume anything about another’s experience and that we can bear witness only to our own experience, we endeavor to use “I” statements.
7. Practice “Both/And.”
We make every effort to acknowledge and honor multiple realities, creating spaciousness for all points of view.
8. Understand the Difference Between Intent and Impact.
We recognize that the impact of our words and actions can often be very different from our intent. Through this dynamic, any of us can cause harm and suffer harm. Therefore, no matter what our intentions, we practice understanding and compassion in receiving a response to our words and actions.
9. Refrain from Blaming or Shaming Self and Others.
Recognizing our own fallibility, we practice humility and avoid arrogance or imposing our views on others. Knowing that powerful emotions can arise as a shout, a stammer, a cry, or silence and that such expressions deserve space and care, we make every effort to avoid blaming and shaming of self or others.